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Writer's pictureSarah Peachey

To All the Friends I've Had Before

We are about to enter the prime PCS season, which means that some of you may be prepping for a big move, or you may be prepping to say your heartfelt, bitter “see you laters” (because, fortunately, there’s no such thing as “goodbye” in this life).


This is a hard time for a lot of us, especially if we are the ones staying put while the friends around us move on. This time of year always makes me reflect on the gift of military spouse friendships, as a number of my friends are leaving this summer.


I became a part of the military community when I joined my husband at his first duty station in 2010. I was a recent college grad (three days prior to my move) and was leaving all of my civilian friends behind. While I floated through various groups of friends in middle school, high school, and college, I had one consistent friend who was with me through all of my school-age years.


Jenny and I had known each other since first grade, and she was helping me move to Louisiana to join my husband. She was with me for so many years in my hometown, supported me during the year-long training my husband left for shortly after we were married, and now she would help me enter the newest chapter of my life.


After arriving in Louisiana, I attended a few FRG meetings and met a few spouses, acquaintances at the time, but I didn’t begin forming any real friendships until my husband deployed. The day after he left, my newest milspouse friend texted me, inviting me for lunch with her kids. Sherry had two boys, ages 3 and 1 at the time, and she would become a dear friend in the weeks and months ahead.


Something about a deployment really forges the bonds of friendship amongst milspouses, and I wasn’t missing out.


My twosome with Sherry grew into a foursome of ladies: Me, Sherry, Victoria, and Erin. These ladies taught me everything about friendship in this community.


We met once a week, every week, for dinner. We were involved in the FRG together as our husbands were all in the same battalion. We would get together for cocktails and meals and chat about our jobs, children (for those who had them), our pets, extended family, and of course, our husbands. My small group was my lifesaver, but they also weren’t the only ones.


My group branched out and included many women in the same situation.


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